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May 9, 2024

#100 S4 EP 20: The Sustainable Manhood Blueprint with RJ and Dustin

#100 S4 EP 20: The Sustainable Manhood Blueprint with RJ and Dustin

As fathers, husbands, and businessmen, we constantly search for the elusive equilibrium in our hectic lives. Today, RJ and Dustin, founders of the Balanced Business Dad movement, extend an open invitation to a conversation that might just hold the key to nurturing that sought-after balance. By intertwining the wisdom of scripture with the realities of modern manhood, they offer a fresh perspective on managing the many roles men are expected to play. Their insights promise not only to enlighten but also to empower listeners in their personal and professional lives.

Every man grapples with the expectations to be both a rock for their families and a maverick in the workplace. Yet, we often overlook the importance of community and vulnerability in this equation. RJ and Dustin unravel this paradox, advocating for a brotherhood that emboldens men to seek help and forge genuine connections. Through their DadUp Council, they've created a supportive milieu where wins and losses are equally celebrated, a testament to the transformative power of shared experiences and the courage to be fully present in every facet of life.

Wrapping up the session, we partake in a collective moment of gratitude, recognizing the valuable contribution each member brings to our community. Remember, as you navigate your path to a balanced life, this movement stands as a testament to the fact that you are not alone. RJ and Dustin's message is clear: join us and become part of a growing family of men passionate about living purposefully and authentically, in alignment with values that uplift and inspire.

"We're excited to announce that we're back for a brand new season! This season, we are making an impact on the world by answering questions about why, what, how, when, and where we can make a difference. As we embark on this journey, we seek the hand of God to guide us and help us shine like the diamonds He made us to be."

This network stems from the Ministry of Exposed Life Change Ministries.  There is teaching, preaching and so much more.  A diamond shines in the light, all colors, with clarity and uniqueness.  It is an open invitation to you.  You can support our brand here with a gift of any amount.  Every cent goes back into the ministry and brand. 

New episodes are now available every Wednesday and Friday at 8pm EST. You can listen to them wherever you usually listen to music. Additionally, you can find them on our website at www.godsdiamond.net. We also host Learning To Live In Truth on Facebook LIVE every night, Monday to Friday at 8pm EST. We are going book to book and verse by verse.

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Make sure you favorite or subscribe to our show!! If we are making a difference in your life please let us know, email us at iamadiamond2021@outlook.com. Go to our website www.godsdiamond.net and leave a review. Find out more about who we are, our merch and more!! Remember in the sight of God YOU ARE A DIAMOND!!!

Chapters

00:00 - Balanced Business Dad Movement Introduction

15:23 - Striving for Balance and Manhood

30:36 - Balanced Business Dad Movement and Support

40:36 - Words of Gratitude and Blessings

Transcript
WEBVTT

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Hello, hello and welcome back One more time.

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We are here and ready to do it again.

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If you don't know who we are by now, I am Catherine.

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And I am Michael.

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And we are so glad to be with you one more time.

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Y'all, we got a guest, or we actually got two guests today with us as we get into this conversation.

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We got RJ and Dustin.

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Would y'all say hello to our diamonds?

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What's up?

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I love that Our diamonds, how we doing diamonds, I love it.

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I love getting to be a diamond today, yeah.

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Because we're all diamonds.

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Yes, I love getting to be a diamond today.

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Yeah, because we're all diamonds.

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Yes, and that's that's our philosophy here that you know, Jesus has given us beautiful ashes and it's just an awesome thing to really just walk in him, a man, and tackle life and go into this and go into that with that in mind.

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And this season, this is perfect for where we're going, impacting the world, Amen.

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And you know, your brand and what you're standing for is awesome because it's teaching about balance and we need balance to really be impactful in our society.

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And so, before we go any further, we are going to pray and then we're going to get into it.

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Okay.

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Well, before we do.

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I got to say this Because this got dropped in my spirit just now when you said it's two guests.

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See, we got to realize because God's word says if there be two, if there be two that agree.

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So there's four right here agreeing.

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There's four right here agreeing.

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There's four right here agreeing.

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So you got to think can we all agree that Jesus is the way?

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Jesus is the way.

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Amen to that Amen 100%.

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So let us pray.

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Dear Heavenly Father, our Lord and our Savior, jesus Christ, we come to you right now saying thank you.

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We thank you for your grace and your mercy.

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We thank you for your love and kindness and tender mercy.

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We beg your forgiveness for anything we might have said, done or thought that's not pleasing to your sight.

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That your grace forgive us and cast us back into the pits of hell where it came from.

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We counsel any assignment of the enemy that will be sent back into the pit of hell where it came from, for he has no power, no dominion, no authority.

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But, according to your word, you say that we do, and we decree it and declare it that we have the authority, the power and the dominion, that we must just walk in it and trust you.

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We pray in the name of Jesus for the ones that has no desire to know who you are.

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We pray in the name of Jesus for the ones who do know who you are but don't know how to reach you.

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We pray in the name of Jesus interceding for the ones that pray for me.

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We pray in the name of Jesus interceding for everybody on their behalf of knowing who you are.

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We decree it and we declare it, we ask these things all in jesus mighty and max's name.

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We say thank you and we say amen, amen and amen, amen.

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So, guys, tell us who you are as we jump in.

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We're gonna dive head first.

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Tell us who we are and what you're all about, what you're doing, yeah love it.

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I'm gonna go age before beauty.

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Oh dang it just once.

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I don't want my age to come up in the first three minutes, but it happens.

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So, in the broad sense, uh, so I'm rj, by the way, so people can start figuring out the voices I'm the old one, and together we are, as we refer, the pioneers of the balanced business dad movement.

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Sometimes we refer to it as a ministry, because somebody pointed that out to us one of the last times we were all together.

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So we're here in suburbs of beautiful St Louis, missouri enjoying a fall day, and we started this movement about a year and a half ago With our goal, we say, is just to be better tomorrow than you are today, and we want to help business dads fathers to do the same thing.

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That's our core mission really.

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Things have grown since then, but we base everything on the six pillars of life that we identified when putting this together, which are in order of importance.

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By the way, this is the priority order is your faith, your health, your marriage, fatherhood, brotherhood and your business, purposefully put last, although we know most men that we deal with have it first.

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So that's it.

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That is a very quick summary of what the balanced business dad is as far as for me, RJ.

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So I'm a Christian, I'm a dad, I'm an empty nester, I have three grown kids, all married, and an entrepreneur.

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At this point, I own a couple of businesses, some with Dustin, who I'll turn it over to now so he can introduce himself.

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Hey guys.

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So, coach Dustin, I'm a coach.

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I coach mostly businesses, but a lot of life, a lot of real estate.

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I coach mostly businesses, but a lot of life, a lot of real estate.

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And yeah, like RJ said, we started the balance business about a year and a half ago.

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Rj and I have known each other for years and I was actually coaching RJ and his wife on real estate and how to invest in other quite well during that time and it was funny because I was for lack of a better word using RJ as a mentor, as a husband and a father.

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You know, his kids are closer to my age than I am his age and they are all pretty good people in society.

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So I was like, oh, I want that.

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And his wife and him just celebrated 35 years of marriage and she still seems to like him.

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I'm like, oh, I want that.

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And his wife and him just celebrated 35 years of marriage and she still seems to like him.

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I'm like, oh, I want that, right, so I'm going to model that.

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And so I was leaning on him, probably without him knowing it, but as a mentor and a father, in those two things, while he was using me as a coach in business and entrepreneurship While he was using me as a coach in business and entrepreneurship, and I had a coach at the time and my coach said who is your ideal person to coach?

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And immediately I said the business dad, because that's who I am.

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And we started talking about doing a podcast and the next thing you know we always say that it started one night at a bar, like all good stories, and we just knew our life was good.

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But what else, what else could it be?

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And that's where the six pillars, like RJ just mentioned, came from.

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And it was interesting because I have coached so many men that had that so out of whack because they were so focused on their business.

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I'm like, yeah, but do your kids know you?

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Does your spouse know you?

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I have an interesting health journey, so I knew how important health was and we all know that we're just stewards for all everything that we have.

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We're just being a steward for God, right, and so it's like we got to start there, because he's the one who are giving us these gifts that we're working so hard on.

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So we have to grow deeper in our faith to have it.

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Yeah absolutely so.

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That's the balanced business I love that introduction yeah.

00:07:34.761 --> 00:07:39.971
I really love it because you're something you said and I just want to, you know, piggyback on it.

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You know you say while you was coaching him, you know you was quote him, you know you was quote unquote using him.

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But we got to understand that when we go through things in life where we are coaching or teaching, we're learning at the same time.

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And I say that because you know we might be coaching somebody on an area of their life and just use faith for an example.

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You know it's not only teaching them about faith, but it's actually growing our faith as well.

00:08:11.415 --> 00:08:22.673
Yeah, so it's almost like we're burning the torch at both ends we're gaining more concept and insight on it, as well as teaching what we already know.

00:08:23.916 --> 00:08:24.137
Yeah.

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Absolutely insight on it as well as teach them what we already know.

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Yeah, absolutely so with the topic at hand.

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And why do I need faith?

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Uh, what is your thought in, in, in, especially since that's your first pillar?

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Uh, in um, this model that you all are living and following.

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Why do I need faith To be impactful?

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Start with that.

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Yeah, yeah, to be impactful.

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Why do I need faith?

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Yeah, so, both of us being Christians, and that's where this, you know, first and foremost, that's where it starts.

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And so, as a Christian, you believe that everything we're doing is a gift from God and we're giving it up because of God.

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It's all in Jesus's name.

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So that's why, for us, I mean faith is number one in our lives.

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I think each one of us either one, if you'd ask us who we are the first answer we're going to say is a Christian, then probably a husband or a father.

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So we knew that faith just had to be the very first thing.

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It's what we use as our guidepost for everything.

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There was somebody that I think was on one of our podcasts and said that's his decision making.

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If he wants to do something.

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He asked would God be pleased with me doing it?

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Would my wife be pleased with me doing it, and would my kids be proud of me for doing it?

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He said I very rarely.

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If you get a no on any of them, you're going to stop.

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You very rarely get to number two, because you're not going to say if God doesn't want you to, he might be okay.

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But let me see what my wife thinks.

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So that became a guidepost.

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So for us, faith had to be number one and faith to us.

00:10:08.004 --> 00:10:09.509
We talk a lot of times about faith with a big F and faith with a little F.

00:10:09.509 --> 00:10:10.352
There's a lot of faith in our life.

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Dustin's used the thought he said before you have faith when you're driving that the car coming the other way isn't going to cross that yellow line.

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We have faith when we get home that the thermostat's going to work.

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There's so much that we have that.

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We just have faith in things and our events.

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But the big F faith, that's where we derive something, that's where we derive everything from, that's where we make all our decisions.

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It's how we built the other pillars below it, because we knew our faith was number one.

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Amen.

00:10:35.633 --> 00:10:46.918
So faith is definitely a major, major component to getting where it is that God desires you to go.

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Diamonds, I mean, I don't know how else we can say it, because all four of us have the same thought and it's been deposited from the Father himself the way that we think and you're not crazy because you believe in faith.

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You know what I mean.

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A lot of people, the world, will make you think that you're crazy because you live by your faith, and we're all here to say there is nothing wrong with living by faith.

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As a matter of fact, it's an expectation that Jesus requires of all of us.

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And balance in order to stay balanced.

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Faith, like it's already been said, you got a big f and a little f.

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It's in everything it really is.

00:11:31.091 --> 00:11:36.201
So anybody else have any thoughts in in in regard to anything said thus far?

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I would definitely say that we got to understand that faith is not only a must, but it's also entwined with trust, because you know, not only and just you think.

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For example, you have faith that that car is not going to cross the line.

00:11:57.173 --> 00:12:00.210
Okay, what about sitting in a chair?

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We got to have faith, or trust, that that chair is not going to break.

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And there's an anonym that I like to use with the word faith Forsaken all, I trust him, meaning that forgetting everything that could possibly go wrong in life, at the end of the day, I'm going to trust God.

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Amen.

00:12:25.553 --> 00:12:33.243
So how, with everything that has been said thus far in your model and your framework, how do you help men?

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Why men in particular?

00:12:37.494 --> 00:12:41.081
Great question and I honestly think it went back to that question.

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When I was building my coaching practice and my coaching business to not just be real estate investors.

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My coach which I believe all good coaches should have a coach right my coach said who is your ideal client?

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And immediately I said the word business dad and I believe God put that on my heart at that point and I didn't know what it meant and, honestly, a year and a half ago, rj and I did not know what the balanced business dad was or what it was going to be, and I still think it's growing.

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Yet we knew we were men, we knew we were dads, we knew we were business dads and we had seen the challenges and the hardships that a lot of these other business dads because we hung out in the same circles were having.

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And, like I said, I had coached a lot of people and when they start bringing to me the amount of money they made and things like that, my first question was well, do your kids like you Right?

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Does your wife like you Right?

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Because that's what matters at the end of the day.

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And I have Again, my kids are a lot younger.

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My kids are 6 and 3.

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So I'm a new father and I'm learning through it, and it's not easy.

00:13:52.964 --> 00:13:57.076
There's not a book that says this is how you be this awesome business, dad.

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And yet I knew there was different sections of life that were important to us and we had to keep them all up in the air at the same time.

00:14:06.658 --> 00:14:11.410
So balancing is a verb, it's not a noun.

00:14:11.410 --> 00:14:16.883
We're constantly doing it and what we've realized is is there ever true balance?

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No, yet we strive for it, but really balance is being present in the pillar you're supposed to be in.

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When I'm with God and I'm growing and I'm learning in my faith, I need to be present.

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I need to be where my feet are.

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When I'm with the time with my wife, same thing.

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But I also need to be very present with my kids.

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I need to be present with my friends.

00:14:41.510 --> 00:14:44.758
Men don't have a lot of brothers anymore.

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Right, you might have a beer friend here and there, but you're really not.

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You're having these surface level conversations and I want to push through that.

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And when it's time to work, it's time to work.

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Be present in your work, go to work.

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That way you can leave work and it's funny and not to take too much of this.

00:15:04.304 --> 00:15:13.760
But somebody said, oh, you're doing man work, you're working with men and stuff like that, and I didn't realize the challenge that that was.

00:15:13.760 --> 00:15:27.082
At the beginning of this year I threw two business conferences and I sold out in a week and a half as soon as I put tickets on sale to talk to people how to have a better business, learn that kind of thing.

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We put on a workshop a month ago a month and a half ago now for business dads and it was like pulling teeth to get dads to come there to say, hey, I need help.

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It's very hard for a man to say, hey, I do need help in this and I want to get better in this.

00:15:46.158 --> 00:15:54.422
And at that point I realized if a tree falls on my house today, I can make a phone call and all these guys are going to be there.

00:15:54.422 --> 00:16:05.960
But if I say, hey, I want to help you become a better husband and a better father and a better leader, they're like, no, I'm good, but if you need that tree off your house, I got you Right.

00:16:05.960 --> 00:16:12.590
Men need a mission and what we have to realize is we are the mission.

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You are the mission first, and it starts with God.

00:16:18.320 --> 00:16:21.196
That's profound, that is a real profound thing.

00:16:21.216 --> 00:16:39.913
And you know, as a guy a male as well as a father you know it is hard for us guys to actually say we need help, because we look at it as like it's almost like and I hate to use this word, but it's true.

00:16:39.933 --> 00:16:58.904
It's almost like and I hate to use this word, but it's true, it's almost like a generational curse, seeing that us men, as men, we used to be the strong foundation, but at the end of the day we got to realize, look, there's some times that we get to a point in life that it's okay to ask for help.

00:16:58.904 --> 00:17:05.022
It's okay that sometimes, as men, we need that time to vent and cry.

00:17:05.022 --> 00:17:18.210
At times we need that time where we just need a hug, even if and I'm going to say this like this because you know people look at it as wrong for a male to hug a male.

00:17:18.210 --> 00:17:30.001
But sometimes we need that embracement from a male to know that what we're going through, maybe they've been through that already and they can help us with just that hug.

00:17:30.001 --> 00:17:38.857
So it's okay to hug that man, it's okay to cry, it's okay to say I need help.

00:17:38.857 --> 00:17:41.346
It is hard and it's even okay to say I need help.

00:17:41.346 --> 00:17:46.576
It is hard and it's even harder to say it than to live it out.

00:17:46.576 --> 00:17:47.920
It is.

00:17:48.862 --> 00:17:52.096
Yeah, that's a lot where this came from, and I'm a hugger, by the way.

00:17:52.910 --> 00:17:54.055
Dustin knows to stay away.

00:17:56.932 --> 00:17:57.714
And one of the original.

00:17:57.714 --> 00:18:14.885
The early thoughts on this was working with the men's groups at my church and the pastor that heads up the men's work and the men's groups always struggles to pull off new events or just men's Bible studies.

00:18:14.885 --> 00:18:21.160
Attendance is really hard to get the women's groups oh yeah, they show up all the time.

00:18:21.160 --> 00:18:22.550
Theirs are always full.

00:18:22.550 --> 00:18:26.652
The men's group will start something and then a little wane, go away and then there's nobody there again.

00:18:26.652 --> 00:18:29.902
It's nonstop and it just feeds right into this.

00:18:29.902 --> 00:18:31.487
Men are fixers.

00:18:31.487 --> 00:18:51.576
Oh, I got this, I'm good, I don't need to show up, I got it all figured out, I know what I'm doing and we've seen it just bleed right over from that same thing of trying to get a men's group at church off the ground is difficult and we're seeing it now with the men we deal with and we naturally say we're good and it's funny, at our church you know that they had the same challenges.

00:18:52.178 --> 00:19:04.182
But there's also a big uh non-for-profit that they support, which is where they build beds for local in our local community for people to sleep on, and that day, 125 guys will show up with their drills.

00:19:04.182 --> 00:19:05.785
All right, we got to build something, let's build.

00:19:05.785 --> 00:19:06.486
We got to build a bed.

00:19:06.486 --> 00:19:10.416
We're not going to talk about things, but I'll build that bed.

00:19:11.941 --> 00:19:17.653
Right, yeah, yeah, we do what we call the backpack attack, where we load up school supplies.

00:19:17.653 --> 00:19:20.959
At the beginning of every year People donate backpacks and then all kinds of supplies.

00:19:20.959 --> 00:19:26.021
Well, on that final Sunday then everybody has to get there to pack them up, load them on the trucks.

00:19:32.875 --> 00:19:53.363
Yeah, there'll be 56 men there for that how God has strategically created man to be the provider, to be the fixer, to be the strong one, quote unquote and the women come alongside to be the helpmate.

00:19:53.363 --> 00:20:08.500
And so, with that being said, how, with the man in mind, can y'all picture I believe it's the scriptures, first corinthians, chapter 13, and he said when I became a man, put away childish things.

00:20:08.500 --> 00:20:12.154
What's y'all's thought in in perspective of man, of a man?

00:20:12.154 --> 00:20:14.479
What is your thoughts?

00:20:14.479 --> 00:20:22.914
Uh, I would say michael, dustin and rj, what are y'all y'all's thoughts in regard to that particular verse in the love chapter?

00:20:22.914 --> 00:20:25.148
About 1 Corinthians, chapter 13?

00:20:27.959 --> 00:20:32.136
I'm not sure if I'm familiar with the scripture, but I would say he'll read it.

00:20:32.176 --> 00:20:40.554
He'll read it for you so I got my phones right up there, so I can't pull up my bible app without getting up, and it's actually 1.

00:20:40.574 --> 00:20:43.659
Corinthians and that's one of my favorite scriptures, by the way, too.

00:20:43.659 --> 00:20:58.217
It's 1 Corinthians, chapter 13, verse 11, which says in King James Version when I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child, but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

00:21:02.931 --> 00:21:03.332
That's good.

00:21:03.653 --> 00:21:08.473
I know that one, you know to be a man to put away those childish things.

00:21:08.473 --> 00:21:14.934
It's, it's a lot of, and if you bring it back in, you know the, the almost the secular world today.

00:21:14.934 --> 00:21:24.962
To put away the childish activities and the that, the pastimes that you're going to do, because you are becoming the provider, you are becoming the foundation, and things grow from the foundation.

00:21:24.962 --> 00:21:27.316
Right, Everybody needs to have a strong foundation.

00:21:27.316 --> 00:21:30.010
Anything needs to have a strong foundation to grow.

00:21:30.471 --> 00:21:40.380
So to be that man, I need to be the leader, the faith leader, in my household to provide faith for them, to teach them about God, to walk alongside God.

00:21:40.380 --> 00:21:52.317
Right, it's the same thing in my marriage as well, the same thing to pray for my wife on a daily basis, you know, for her faith to grow, for her needs to be met.

00:21:52.317 --> 00:21:55.326
And it's also to do that in my business.

00:21:55.326 --> 00:22:04.182
Right, because we're a leader in our businesses and I have to show up with a firm foundation, and I don't believe a firm foundation happens without God.

00:22:04.182 --> 00:22:05.549
Right, right.

00:22:05.549 --> 00:22:10.804
And to be that foundation to me is what it means to be a man, yeah.

00:22:12.210 --> 00:22:12.310
RJ.

00:22:12.310 --> 00:22:18.733
Yeah, so I'm thinking listening to the last couple of your podcasts, because October was man Month.

00:22:18.733 --> 00:22:21.557
It sounds like from the podcast that you just had.

00:22:23.119 --> 00:22:23.461
Yes, sir.

00:22:24.224 --> 00:22:34.278
And when we first started talking about this all the time, and especially as Jesus tells us that we need to be the faith leader we were put on earth to.

00:22:34.278 --> 00:22:37.968
Basically, you know it's a hard one for me to go into and I'll tell you why in a minute.

00:22:37.968 --> 00:22:39.030
But you know, take care of women.

00:22:39.030 --> 00:22:50.512
They're here for you know, for us, to give them protection, security, make them feel heard and safe, and that's definitely what the message is for us.

00:22:50.512 --> 00:23:04.991
I mean, we want to be the modern man Now, a modern man, as we joke, but without sword shields and a Spartan helmet, but the modern man that's sensitive yet knows that they're the leader, the faith leader, the family leader, the business leader.

00:23:04.991 --> 00:23:21.155
And where I say that that was something at the very beginning of this, when I would speak about that, as I grew up in a female household, I had a father and he was there, but we were drastically outnumbered because I have five big sisters and a mother and my father traveled all the time.

00:23:21.155 --> 00:23:23.692
So, as I say, I grew up swimming in the estrogen ocean.

00:23:23.692 --> 00:23:27.626
So if there's anybody that's around strong women, it was me.

00:23:27.626 --> 00:23:28.650
I was thriving.

00:23:28.650 --> 00:23:31.017
I had six strong women raising me.

00:23:31.017 --> 00:23:36.070
So when we first start talking about, the man has to be the leader of the household.

00:23:36.070 --> 00:23:38.817
He's there to make sure that women feel safe and secure.

00:23:39.486 --> 00:23:46.689
I had a lot of internal pushback on that because my first thought were I don't think my sisters want to hear that they might show up and slap me.

00:23:46.689 --> 00:23:49.436
We're strong women, we don't need that.

00:23:49.436 --> 00:23:55.557
But with my own conversations with my family, with my wife, it was amazing how they all agreed.

00:23:55.557 --> 00:23:59.112
It's like no, that is what I want in a husband.

00:23:59.112 --> 00:24:03.826
I do want a man that's strong, that I can rely on, that I can trust.

00:24:03.826 --> 00:24:09.886
So it added a lot of strength to me as far as the conviction of what we talk about, which is purely biblical.

00:24:09.886 --> 00:24:12.349
In the same way, that's what our mission is here.

00:24:12.349 --> 00:24:24.356
We don't want women to be meek, but our calling, the reason we're here, is to be that leader, especially the faith leader, and it travels right through into our business and our family as well.

00:24:24.980 --> 00:24:26.184
Amen, Amen.

00:24:26.184 --> 00:24:31.329
And that scripture definitely has everything to do with a level of maturity.

00:24:31.329 --> 00:24:37.976
A level of maturity in the fact that, just like faith, love is rooted out of.

00:24:37.976 --> 00:24:55.584
I would say that faith is rooted out of love, because if we love God, he says we'll obey him, and you know the fact that faith is a substance of things that are hoped for.

00:24:55.584 --> 00:24:58.527
Again, it comes back to love, and in that particular verse it's just like.

00:24:58.527 --> 00:25:21.008
It shows me personally how God looks at all of us, but particularly in men, as, look, I have designed you and I've created you on purpose, so that you know, not only are you strong, not only are you the fixer-uppers, but you are me.

00:25:21.849 --> 00:25:21.910
And.

00:25:22.089 --> 00:25:24.074
Jesus bringing the balance.

00:25:24.074 --> 00:25:33.825
Jesus, through our relationship with him, brings forth the maturity that makes us not just men, but for us ladies, they make us women.

00:25:34.744 --> 00:25:44.314
And so again, we always come back to you are a diamond, no matter your age, no matter the mistakes that you make, no matter what.

00:25:44.314 --> 00:25:58.779
At the end of the day, if you understand who Jesus is, you understand who you are in him, you will find that you are a diamond and that you can and you will impact this world, man or woman.

00:25:58.779 --> 00:26:03.634
Amen, come on somebody, don't y'all leave me by myself amen on that, amen.

00:26:03.673 --> 00:26:04.236
I love it, amen.

00:26:04.236 --> 00:26:18.156
So you know what I'll say when I, when I look at this scripture and and I see it as as twofold, and I say twofold because you know every when you.

00:26:18.156 --> 00:26:22.412
I say twofold because it's spiritually and carnal.

00:26:22.412 --> 00:26:35.132
When you look at in a carnal mindset of that scripture, it's almost basically saying you need to man up, you need to act, your age, you need to, uh, push through it.

00:26:35.413 --> 00:26:46.602
But when you look at it in the spiritual realm, it was almost like God is saying look, I designed you to be the provider, be the head.

00:26:46.602 --> 00:26:50.777
But at the same token he's saying look, it's okay to ask for help.

00:26:50.777 --> 00:27:01.519
I don't want you to act like a robot, because that's what the world would look at as a man, as you got to do this, you got to do that, you got to do this, you cannot fail.

00:27:01.519 --> 00:27:07.738
But God is saying, look, despite everything that you go through, you're going to make mistakes.

00:27:07.738 --> 00:27:09.185
You're going to fail.

00:27:09.185 --> 00:27:15.891
Because his word tells us I think it's in Romans, for all has seen and fallen short of the glory of God.

00:27:15.891 --> 00:27:19.252
We got to realize that look, no matter what, we're going to make mistakes.

00:27:19.252 --> 00:27:30.740
But it's the point of making a mistake and staying there versus making a mistake and learning from it and pushing past it.

00:27:31.862 --> 00:27:33.306
Amen, amen.

00:27:33.306 --> 00:27:38.006
So we're getting down to our time here shortly, amen, amen.

00:27:38.006 --> 00:27:39.309
So we're getting down to our time here shortly.

00:27:39.309 --> 00:27:46.555
But we wanted you to talk about Dad Up Council and how people can get in contact with you and how people can just really experience what God has given you to give the world.

00:27:47.902 --> 00:27:51.651
Dad Up Council, yeah absolutely the Dad Up Council.

00:27:51.651 --> 00:28:03.387
So that is the private mastermind, I guess, is the best word for it, but the private mastermind that we have where we do life together with the other guys, with the other men, to help them be better in all things.

00:28:03.387 --> 00:28:26.140
It's also a journey, right, the journey of a balanced business, dad, which what we're striving for is a thriving business that doesn't control us, a passionate marriage, kids that adore us, to be healthier physically and mentally, to grow deeper in our faith and that encompasses it, right.

00:28:26.140 --> 00:28:30.246
And then more meaningful relationships with the friends, of course, and that's where the council comes in.

00:28:30.246 --> 00:28:32.009
It's that brotherhood.

00:28:32.230 --> 00:28:35.748
You mentioned something about making a mistake and we're all going to make a mistake.

00:28:35.748 --> 00:28:42.371
The interesting thing we have retreats.

00:28:42.371 --> 00:29:08.795
I actually own a campground in South Central Missouri where we'll have these retreats, where it's just us guys there, and so many of these guys at first were afraid to say what mistake they made, because they were there, they didn't know how to get through it and finally, when they did say that, the other guy at the other end said oh, when I did that five years ago, this is how I got through it and this is how my family pushed through and this is how we made it Right, so it was able to move through that mistake at such a faster clip.

00:29:08.795 --> 00:29:11.708
And that's what the DadUp Council is being all about.

00:29:11.708 --> 00:29:23.125
It's to be better tomorrow and that's what we do life together as, and we have mastermind calls, retreats, modules, coaching sessions kind of encompasses everything.

00:29:23.747 --> 00:29:28.559
We also have a free Facebook group at dadupgroupcom.

00:29:28.559 --> 00:29:37.137
You can join that free Facebook group right there and there's close to 4, well, about 350 guys right now doing life together saying, hey, what, how do I do this?

00:29:37.137 --> 00:29:37.898
How do we do this?

00:29:37.898 --> 00:29:39.530
You know, how do I make this better?

00:29:39.530 --> 00:29:41.590
So dadupgroupcom.

00:29:42.273 --> 00:29:45.492
Yep, that's the easiest way to keep hanging out with us.

00:29:45.492 --> 00:29:49.926
Yeah, if that sounds like fun, y'all have a website.

00:29:49.926 --> 00:29:55.257
And, by the way, even though we're adults, yep, it is thebalancedbusinessdadcom.

00:29:55.257 --> 00:30:02.497
Okay, so that will have yeah, pretty simple.

00:30:02.517 --> 00:30:04.785
Thebalancedbusinessdadcom.

00:30:09.153 --> 00:30:17.032
The Facebook group is yeah, go to dadupgroupcom and that'll take you right to the public Facebook group from data groupcom.

00:30:17.032 --> 00:30:26.371
But yeah, so there's the website and there's information in there on the whole movement and the balanced business to heads and a blog on there and call it a movement.

00:30:27.080 --> 00:30:28.405
Why do you call it a movement?

00:30:28.425 --> 00:30:29.108
We call it a movement.

00:30:30.980 --> 00:30:44.651
You know I think it started with I've coached so many people who were out of alignment and out of balance and we want to change that and if I have time I'll tell you kind of the joke about it.

00:30:45.803 --> 00:30:56.433
So when this really started, I was planning a Disney World trip with my family and I want the Balanced Business Dad and the Dad data council to be so big in a movement.

00:30:56.433 --> 00:31:00.789
If you guys know what the organization is, you know alcohol anonymous.

00:31:00.789 --> 00:31:13.708
It's called the friends of Bill W because Bill W started that and in my vision, how big I see this is is because I've seen, I've heard that at an airport will a friend of Bill W come here to talk to someone?

00:31:13.708 --> 00:31:38.404
Or at a hotel, I want it and I said at the time kind of jokingly but friend of mickey mouse, right, when I hear the friend of mickey, I know that's a business dad that really just needs some help right now to talk through some things and that's a movement, just like bill did with, uh, you know alcohol anonymous because, trust me, you look around at disney world and you see some of those dads ooh, buddy, they need some help some days, right.

00:31:38.404 --> 00:31:43.730
So, yeah, that's the movement, yep, to let them know they're not alone.

00:31:44.530 --> 00:31:45.772
Yeah, because we're on this journey.

00:31:45.772 --> 00:31:50.396
I mean, dustin and I are on this journey to be, you know, the journey of a balanced business dad.

00:31:50.396 --> 00:31:53.864
So then the thought was, well, we just need to bring this to other dads.

00:31:53.864 --> 00:31:57.692
We're doing it ourselves, we need to just bring this to other guys.

00:31:57.692 --> 00:32:01.893
So that's how the podcast was born, and then everything after it.

00:32:02.376 --> 00:32:02.659
Amen.

00:32:02.659 --> 00:32:13.064
I know that God's timing is always perfect timing, but I wish that we had scheduled this right in that in that moment in that little part where, um, it was just for me and cause I was.

00:32:13.144 --> 00:32:41.602
This is powerful for men, because it's such a sad thing when men lose their identity based on the past, based on what somebody said about them, based on some of my negative words and all of that and so much you know.

00:32:41.622 --> 00:32:44.593
I can definitely appreciate when the scripture says for women as women, we ought to respect our men and for husbands to love their wives.

00:32:44.593 --> 00:32:46.400
It is powerful and it's so different the two words love and respect.

00:32:46.400 --> 00:32:57.711
And I just realized, and I know, that respecting my husband and respecting men goes so much further than me trying to make him be what I want him to be.

00:32:57.711 --> 00:33:01.588
You know what I mean and that was, you know that's for women.

00:33:01.588 --> 00:33:19.388
That's what we got to understand is that our responsibility is to respect our men, not just our husbands, not just our dad, not just our brother, but respect men and the level of weight and responsibility they have, just as a man alone.

00:33:19.388 --> 00:33:21.502
And you know so.

00:33:21.502 --> 00:33:41.852
That's really my takeaway from all of this and the fact that you know, in order to be a man, it requires intentionality, and that's what I see about balanced business that it's an intentional thing to really do it the way that God says to do it.

00:33:42.093 --> 00:33:45.980
It's intentional and for me there's no other way to say it.

00:33:45.980 --> 00:33:52.461
And so, again, I just appreciate you all being here with us and chatting with us for a little while.

00:33:52.461 --> 00:33:53.965
That is my takeaway, honey.

00:33:53.965 --> 00:33:54.768
What is your takeaway?

00:33:54.768 --> 00:33:56.491
He's looking up y'all's stuff.

00:33:57.020 --> 00:33:58.708
Now I'm trying to find y'all on Facebook.

00:33:58.708 --> 00:34:08.211
I actually looked under the wrong page so I got different I guess different roles on my phone, gotcha.

00:34:08.820 --> 00:34:15.545
If you're on Facebook, you can just type in the Balance Business Dad and you'll see the actual page, but there will also be a group.

00:34:15.545 --> 00:34:18.791
You click on that group and then I'll approve you.

00:34:18.791 --> 00:34:23.047
All right, great, and I should have a white background.

00:34:23.047 --> 00:34:25.065
This picture just in a white background.

00:34:25.186 --> 00:34:26.170
There's up.

00:34:27.523 --> 00:34:28.376
No, I'll do it.

00:34:28.376 --> 00:34:29.902
Nope, the balance business dad.

00:34:29.902 --> 00:34:32.048
Okay, give me that yeah.

00:34:34.139 --> 00:34:34.400
See.

00:34:34.721 --> 00:34:35.181
I need help.

00:34:35.181 --> 00:34:35.742
I need help, helpmate.

00:34:35.742 --> 00:34:36.744
See the helpmate.

00:34:36.744 --> 00:34:38.005
Yeah, exactly.

00:34:38.025 --> 00:34:38.987
Uh-huh, I love it.

00:34:39.527 --> 00:35:00.657
My takeaway is simply this Look and I said it before and I got to say it again Look, we got to realize that.

00:35:00.657 --> 00:35:05.431
Help that you got it all together, because at the end of the day, you do not have it all together.

00:35:05.431 --> 00:35:13.152
We need help, far from we need help, whether it's from other men helping us or even our spouses.

00:35:13.152 --> 00:35:14.385
We need help.

00:35:14.385 --> 00:35:17.184
Receive the help.

00:35:17.184 --> 00:35:21.806
Stop putting up the resistance and just let God use you.

00:35:21.806 --> 00:35:23.429
That's my takeaway.

00:35:24.371 --> 00:35:24.751
Right.

00:35:25.072 --> 00:35:25.994
Love it, I love it.

00:35:26.074 --> 00:35:26.775
Receive the help.

00:35:28.000 --> 00:35:29.346
What's y'all's takeaway, fellas?

00:35:29.840 --> 00:35:47.630
Tell us y'all's takeaway, y'all's final word for every diamond that is here, give us what it is that God has given you as a wrap up, I'm honestly going to take away from what was, honestly, what Michael just said Receive the help Open to be receiving the help, because there's a lot of help out there.

00:35:47.630 --> 00:35:52.030
And something else he said there is ask for the other, help with the other men.

00:35:52.030 --> 00:35:58.932
One of the things that we teach so often that so many of us don't do ask your spouse.

00:35:58.932 --> 00:36:05.052
The one person that's rooting for you more than anyone is that spouse.

00:36:05.052 --> 00:36:11.989
And you keeping it all in and not asking for help because you think you're being the strong man.

00:36:11.989 --> 00:36:16.585
You're not Ask for help and I'll be honest, I'll just speak for myself.

00:36:16.585 --> 00:36:17.668
I'll speak for RJ too.

00:36:17.668 --> 00:36:22.239
Our wives know a lot more than we do, right, absolutely.

00:36:22.239 --> 00:36:25.989
So let's ask for help, right?

00:36:26.110 --> 00:36:37.262
Yeah, and we think we're being strong by hiding it from them and handling our own problems, whether it's in business or your personal life or with your kids from them and handling our own problems, whether it's in business or your personal life or with your kids.

00:36:37.262 --> 00:36:38.105
It's amazing how freeing that is.

00:36:38.105 --> 00:36:43.646
When you finally bring it up in a conversation with your wife and they just want to help.

00:36:43.646 --> 00:36:45.612
They're like oh good, that's out there now.

00:36:45.612 --> 00:36:52.463
It's freeing because now we're not holding that burden in, but they've got way better ideas and they're sending us solutions.

00:36:52.483 --> 00:37:00.967
They're like like, well, besides that, yeah, we knew that part we're trying to rebuild everything, right, yeah?

00:37:01.447 --> 00:37:09.548
right so, yeah, that's our advice involve your spouse, just ask them, tell them what's going on hey, y'all heard it.

00:37:09.688 --> 00:37:10.451
Y'all heard it.

00:37:10.451 --> 00:37:11.840
I know that's right.

00:37:11.840 --> 00:37:22.936
So, uh, we want to ask one of you gentlemen to please pray for everybody that is here, and Michael will give his closing comment and we'll be done, amen.

00:37:25.940 --> 00:37:27.121
Dustin always likes it when I pray.

00:37:27.121 --> 00:37:28.963
I'm not sure I can pray like Michael.

00:37:28.963 --> 00:37:30.463
That is his spiritual gift.

00:37:30.463 --> 00:37:33.646
I've heard it on the podcast and I heard it when we opened up today.

00:37:33.646 --> 00:37:34.186
I'm like, wow, he's good.

00:37:34.186 --> 00:37:36.449
I've heard it on the podcast and I heard it when we opened up today.

00:37:36.449 --> 00:37:37.009
I'm like, wow, he's good.

00:37:37.009 --> 00:37:37.610
Yeah, we have a friend.

00:37:37.610 --> 00:37:39.811
We have a friend, alejandro Carnejo, and that is it.

00:37:39.811 --> 00:37:40.952
We're at Bible study.

00:37:40.952 --> 00:37:43.134
We always want him to pray because he has that gift.

00:37:43.353 --> 00:37:47.458
I will be glad to make a little prayer right now to thank the Lord Jesus.

00:37:47.458 --> 00:37:57.992
I want to thank you for putting Dustin and I in touch with Catherine and Michael, allowing the four of us to basically do church together today for a half an hour.

00:37:57.992 --> 00:38:01.681
I want to ask for your blessing on all of the diamonds that are listening to this.

00:38:01.681 --> 00:38:03.144
We're all looking for help.

00:38:03.144 --> 00:38:08.427
We're looking to be that diamond in the rough, to get better, to be shinier, obviously, to be stronger.

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And I said thank you for the people that maybe they're not that far along in this path yet but somehow hear this, this message that we've put out there.

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We don't know how this gets delivered.

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We don't know how husbands, fathers and dads find us, but we appreciate your guidance to them and I just want to ask for your blessing to all the people that are listening and thank Michael and Catherine for allowing us to join them for the day.

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It's in your son's name that I say thank you, and we pray Amen.

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Amen.

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Amen.

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Thank y'all again.

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God bless you.

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We appreciate you.

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Don't go nowhere.

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Go ahead honey, hi Diamonds, all right, diamonds, you know what time it is.

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If you can't hear me, get a little closer, come on, get a little closer.

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Come on, get a little closer and remember until next time you are a diamond in the rough amen, amen, thank y'all.